


Immortal

by m00nbeem



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Drinking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Fluff, Levi is in love, Love Confessions, M/M, Song fics, Wilderness Survival, drunk!Eren, getting stranded
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-11-05 06:07:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11007564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m00nbeem/pseuds/m00nbeem
Summary: If the earth ends in fire, and the seas are frozen in time, there will be just one survivor; the memory that I was yours and you were mine.(A narrative of Eren and Levi falling in love, all based on Marina and the Diamonds songs)((Yes, I'm serious))





	1. Immortal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And if the Earth ends in fire  
> And the seas are frozen in time  
> There will be just one survivor  
> The memory that I was yours  
> And you were mine
> 
> -Immortal by Marina and the Diamonds

Eren was on his hands and knees, scrubbing the gray stone floor with a bucket of soap and water. The Corporal was in the same room, stuck with the same mundane task. Though, it wasn’t especially mundane for him. He had ordered Squad Levi to clean the old Headquarters the moment they’d arrived. It was dusty and grimy as fuck and as soon as he stepped inside, he was already planning all the ways he could eradicate the dirt. So, that was why all of Squad Levi were running around the ancient castle and Eren was scrubbing like his life depended on it. Corporal Levi was initially supposed to supervise but had decided to join in because of course, _this piss poor brat couldn’t clean worth shit_.

“All done, captain!”

Levi got up, stepped over to view Eren’s work. It was horrendous.

“How the fuck do you think this is done? There’s dirty water still on the floor. Do it again.”

Eren hesitated at Levi’s words.

“Do you have a problem, Jaeger?”

He looked up, startled.

“Uh, no…I just…I’ve been ‘doing it over’ for three times now...” he mumbled albeit slightly self-consciously.

“…”

“…”

Levi stood stock still, poised, resisting the urge to yell at this stupid brat because _god_ it is so fucking infuriating to be talked back to and have orders questioned. I mean, he used to do it all the time when he first joined but _still_ , it’s not like he didn’t have a reason. Closing his eyes and breathing deeply, he said “It’s not your place to question orders. Why you think you can talk back is beyond me. If I say do it, do it. If I say jump, you fucking jump, Jaeger. If I even told you to die, you will die. For your sake, I hope your brain isn’t too small to do the simple things you’re told. Now fucking do it. Again.”

Eren nodded embarrassingly quickly after Levi was finished speaking.

“Yes captain. Sorry captain,” the boy said, his green eyes to the floor. Though the Corporal didn’t raise his voice, it was still absolutely terrifying. In everything the captain said, it seemed there was always an underlying threat. Eren knew it wasn’t exactly personal, but it was scary. Levi was a scary person.

He began wiping up the water, scrubbing all the while. Levi also got on his hands and knees as he dusted the base of an old wooden desk. _Jesus fuck_ , Levi thought, _for as cold as it is outside the walls, it is hotter than shit in this room_. Rising up, he took off his Survey Corps jacket, throwing it in an area he’d cleaned personally. The sound of brass buttons clacking on the floor caught Eren’s attention. The young soldier looked up to see what the noise was.

His eyes locked on Levi, scanning him. His white shirt was molded to his skin and was practically see through from the sweat and water that clung to him. He stared. As unexpected and rude Levi seemed to be, he was really beautiful. He was very muscular. Not in an overbearing way, Eren thought. It looked good on Levi’s compact frame. Nice big arms…large, powerful hands…a really broad back…an amazing ass.

Eren hadn’t realized he had stopped scrubbing. Levi paused, head down, not turning around.

“Get back to work, Jaeger...” he said softly. More gently than Eren had ever heard him speak.

“Yes, captain….” He continued his scrubbing but his eyes lingered. And Levi, with his back turned, smiled to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eren covertly checking out Levi bc ayyyyyeeee
> 
> Get @ me: m00nbeems.tumblr.com


	2. Buy The Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And you could buy up all the stars  
> But it wouldn't change who you are  
> You're still living life in the dark  
> It's just who you are  
> It's just who you are
> 
> -Buy the Stars by Marina and the Diamonds

“I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.”

These words spoken softly, shakily, like a confession, stopped Levi in his tracks. They had made it back inside the walls today. The Survey Corps had lost a lot of good soldiers on this expedition, Squad Levi among the lost. As they moved through town carting the injured and the dead, the remaining were forced to listen to the endless taunting of civilians lined around them on both sides of the street, giving their homecoming an aura of hostility and suffocation. The civilians, they were there yelling, calling the Survey Corps a waste of the government’s money. Saying that all they’re useful for is dying, and at least now they have fewer mouths to feed. All while the remaining soldiers returned with visions of their dying friends, brothers, and sisters seared into their brains. They still could hear their voices screaming until they were hoarse, their bones snapping, and finally, nothing. The body that belonged to your best friend, forever gone, rotting away in some godawful place. And still, the people inside the walls call them useless.

They don’t know about true fear. They don’t know about absolute despair. They don’t know about the guilt of living.

So when Eren all but whispered those two sentences to no one in particular, Levi turned back. He saw Eren’s saucers he called eyes glazed over, staring out the window. It was a starlit night, unbefitting of the day behind them, pinpricks of light twinkling and shining through the pitch dark. Eren sat on the window seat, isolated except for Levi.

“Why are you sorry, Jaeger?”

Eren turned his head to look at Levi wide-eyed. In his introspection he had forgotten Levi was there. He inhaled shakily.

“I’m so sorry captain. If I had transformed, if I had trusted my gut…your squad wouldn’t be dead.”

The boy made no eye contact, staring at a wall in the distance. Levi paused and it was awhile until he spoke again.

“You did transform, Eren.”

Eren grimaced and shook his head, before looking up again out the window.

“Too late...” he answered.

Levi wasn’t exactly shocked to hear this. Far too many times he had questioned his choices, his movements in battle as he lost his comrades one after the other. He knew the weight of the responsibility, the sting of guilt. It never subsided for him, just became easier to overlook. But Eren was still new. And with his ability more responsibility weighed on his not-yet-grown shoulders. Levi slowly stepped closer, eventually joining Eren on the window seat. He looked at the stars. It was nearly unfathomable to him that beauty could coexist along with such ugliness and death.

“I had told you, Eren. I had told you that whatever your choice may be, don’t regret it. A lot of good soldiers die. It’s what happens. As much as we try to prevent it…it will always happen. Realize that no one blames you.”

Eren always knew Levi could be gentle with his words, but the guilt of the four dead ( _their names were petraralauruobrossardeldjinnguntherschultz petraralauruobrossardeldjinnguntherschultz petraralauruobrossardeldjinnguntherschultz_ ) along with the unexpected kindness from his captain nearly broke him. He continued staring at the night sky, not looking at Levi as a single tear slid down his cheek. Eren didn’t bother to wipe it away.

“I’m a…” Eren started.

“What, Eren? You’re a monster?”

Eren, at last, turned to see Corporal Levi looking at him, almost angrily.

“You’re a monster. We get it. This isn’t fucking news, kid. You may be inhuman. But you are a member of my squad.”

Eren felt his jaw begin to quiver, so he looked down at the stone they sat on. Silence. When Eren decided to look back up, Levi was gazing out of the window again.

Quietly, Levi murmured, “you transforming, to me, was never a bad thing.”

Eren slowly took in his captain’s profile. The slope of his nose, his alabaster skin, eyes of obsidian glass observing the stars. Levi turned in Eren’s direction again and for once, neither of them looked away. The Corporal’s dark eyes scanned Eren’s ashen face, calmingly, accommodating.

“It’s okay you’re a monster, Eren.”

The young soldier resisted the urge to hold his captain’s hand. The other did the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor kiddo :(
> 
> Get @ me: m00nbeems.tumblr.com


	3. I'm A Ruin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know that I can’t have it all  
> But without you I am afraid I’ll fall  
> I know I’m playing with your heart  
> And I could treat you better but I’m not that smart
> 
> When it comes to love, you’re an easy fight  
> A flower in a gun, a bird in flight  
> It isn’t fair and it isn’t right  
> To lead you on like it’s all alright
> 
> -I'm A Ruin by Marina and the Diamonds

It was the night after an expedition. Soldiers young and old were gathered in the mess hall. This expedition, compared to the others was a great success. A few were lost but nowhere near the numbers of the 57th expedition a few months back. The Survey Corps managed to get a hold of some alcohol and that was also cause for celebration. It was rare to have alcohol. Pretty much everybody was either drunk or tipsy, and everyone was in good spirits.

Levi was sitting at the officer’s table. Hanji was absolutely roaring drunk, she could never handle her liquor. She somehow convinced some poor random soldier to come sit at the officer’s table so that they could arm wrestle, all the while calling him the wrong name. Erwin watched on, laughing to himself. Levi got tired of the display, drink in hand. He hadn’t drunk a lot tonight. Even if he had, it wouldn’t have much of an effect on him. He was used to much stronger substances, coming from the underground.

Levi scanned the room. His eyes eventually settled at the cadets’ table. That little blond one there, what was his name again? The smart one with the bowl cut. Arming? Levi didn’t really care enough to try and remember the kid’s name tonight.

His eyes swept the table. Eren was there, seated next to Potato Girl and Mikasa. Mikasa wasn’t a huge fan of Levi since the 57th expedition. Or the court room drama. In her eyes, Levi should have kept Eren safe personally. It was his job. The court room crap was obvious. Levi skipped her over and laid his eyes on Eren. Eren did really well on this last expedition. He didn’t even have to transform, his skills were enough now. He helped take a couple titans down and kept himself safe. So of course Eren was celebrating as well. He had a pink blush on his cheeks and was showing that dazzling smile of his. _He looks happy_ , Levi thought. Good. After all the fighting and loss, he deserved it.

_He looked really pretty when he laughed._

Erwin, sitting next to Levi, cleared his throat. Levi broke his gaze from the cadets’ table and took a deep breath before downing his beer very slowly.

He took his time finishing the beer, took an even longer time to thump the mug down on the table.

“…What.”

“Nothing,” said Erwin. “You just looked awfully happy for a second.”

“Well, you know how it goes. Glad the brats can have a good time for a change.”

Erwin grinned close-mouthed. _Fuckin smug_ , Levi thought. _Knowing_.

The Commander of the Survey Corps was awfully nosey when he drank. Only a couple of seconds had passed when Erwin remarked “Eren did a good job today, didn’t he?” Levi tried his best to look unaffected and keep his face impassive.

“Yeah. They all did a good job,” Levi agreed. And that was that. The night went on. The nervous random soldier won the arm wrestling match since Hanji was too drunk to walk properly, let alone arm wrestle. Moblit found her in the mess hall passed out after her loss and woke her up to take her back to her room. As the poor man halfway carried her across the mess hall she laughed loudly, shouting “I love you all so much!!!!” and “Good night, my beautiful children!!!!” as he dragged her away as fast as he could without Hanji’s flailing limbs hitting him in the face.

Erwin drank a lot but like always he was able to keep his composure. Unlike Hanji, as all the soldiers were aware of now. After talking to Levi some more, Erwin sighed.

“I should get going,” he offered as explanation.

“I probably should too,” muttered Levi. He watched Erwin leave after bidding him a goodbye. Moving for the exit, Levi heard a loud crash. _Of course, they can’t manage to keep the mess hall clean for one fucking night._ As he turned he heard shouting in a very familiar voice. Levi saw Eren standing up, fuming, screaming something at Jean. Ah, Jean. That made sense. But however much sense it made, it shouldn’t be happening. Jean was shouting back across the table, fists clenched and ready to fight.

Levi didn’t really pay attention to the content of said words shouted at the top of the boys’ lungs, all the fights between those two were pretty much the same. Even as the captain approached the table, the fighting did not cease. Potato Girl was passed out and snoring on the bench, not hearing a thing. The rest of the cadets sat at the table, looking nervously at Levi, just kind of enduring the whole thing.

“Oi, brats!” Jean looked towards Levi fearfully while Eren’s gaze wobbled slightly. “Why the FUCK do you idiots think it’s okay to do this? You whiny pissbabies need to get over yourselves. Do I need to assign the two of you duties on the Corps’ day off tomorrow?”

“No, sir,” Jean said instantly while Eren’s voice lagged slightly behind.

“You’re both lucky you caught me on a good night or you’d be cleaning this mess hall till tomorrow. Don’t pull this shit again, I won’t hesitate.”

Jean and Eren saluted, Jean running away as the rest of the cadets followed, walking back to their rooms. It was late and the mood had kind of been killed. Eren was kneeling down, trying to wake Potato Girl.

“Saszha…*hic*…Sassshsa, time to get up…” Levi stopped him.

“It’s no use brat, she’s gotta sleep it off.”

Eren looked up, eyes glassy. “Oh…” he lamented, forgetting Levi was standing right there.

“…You probably need to sleep it off too."

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll get going.” Eren stood up too fast and got dizzy. Stumbling, Levi shot out his arm to steady him.

“Jesus,” snapped Levi. Eren looked at Levi holding him up and laughed. The brat apparently found it fucking amusing, because he took a while to calm down.

“Okay. Okay. Sorry. I’ll go,” Eren slurred.

“…Come on, brat. I’ll make sure you get there.”

With the way the young titan shifter was now, he’d probably fall and snap his neck on his way to the basement. Not like he wouldn’t heal, but blood is always a bitch to clean up. Eren tried to start walking on his own and his vision began to look like static. Quickly, the young soldier sat on the bench below him. Levi bent down to look at his face and eyes to make sure he was alright. Eren’s eyes were glazed over and looking to the left, his complexion pale.

“Brat?”

As Levi placed his hand on the boy’s clammy forehead, Eren moved his gaze to the face in front of him and stared. His captain was inches away from his green eyes. He kept his right hand cradling Eren’s jaw as he continued to stare at the Corporal.

“You have really pretty eyes, Levi.”

Levi rolled his “pretty eyes,” slightly flustered by the compliment as he backed away.

“You’re too drunk to walk” sighed Levi, turning to kneel down with his back in front of the drunken soldier. Taking Eren’s arms, he put them around his neck as he hoisted the boy onto him, piggyback style.

“Nnh…,” Eren protested. As much as he whined he had no trouble wrapping tighter around Levi and burying his face into the back of his neck. Levi squeezed Eren’s legs a little tighter. They went through the halls quietly until they reached the steps leading to Eren’s room in the basement.

“Don’t break your neck, Corporal,” Eren all but whispered, lips moving against Levi’s nape. He fought the urge to shiver.

“I kill titans for a living; I think I can handle carrying a drunken brat down some damn stairs.”

Eren giggled softly, air from his laugh chilling Levi’s pale skin. How Levi of all people, damaged and broken, could make this kid laugh was far beyond his thinking capabilities.

 Maybe he could ask Erwin. He’d probably know.

After descending the stairs they reached Eren’s room. From the beginning, Levi was always against chaining the titan shifter to his bed as he slept. It seemed too cruel to Corporal Levi, like stuffing the sun in a bag. Since Eren had been on Levi’s squad, he was never cuffed or restrained in any way. The older male sat his subordinate gently on the bed and leaned back to look into those exquisite eyes.

“Don’t drink like this again, okay brat? It’s not good.”

Eren widened his doe eyes and nodded.

“Okay,” he murmured softly, mind somewhere else.

Levi took too long to back away, caught up in how Eren looked at him with something like wonder or amazement. Before he knew it Eren had leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on his lips, heart beating rapidly in his chest. As this beautiful boy kissed him sweetly, Levi didn’t return it but he closed his eyes, cursing himself for being a piece of shit. Eren, of all people. Eren. The boyish soldier with the weight of the world on his shoulders, and stars in his eyes. Too young for Levi. Too unfledged.

Eren pulled back but was within centimeters of Levi’s face.

“Why’d you do something like that?” he asked, eyes softening.

Eren was silent for a moment, stated “because I wanted to.”

And wasn’t that a surprise? When he get so confident with his words, so sure? It wasn’t just the alcohol. It had come through in different ways. In training. In combat. In how he talked to Levi, how he moved.

Levi shifted his young subordinate so he was lying on the bed, ready to sleep. Eren tried shucking off his boots drunkenly without undoing any of the laces, but Levi put a stop to it, sighing heavily.

“Hey wiggler. Quit it.”

  _I always have to take care of this brat. Why is that? Why is that happening to me?_

He removed the boots as Eren shifted, trying to get comfortable. Both soldiers shared a glance for a few seconds. Eren smiled softly, still looking at Levi fondly.

_Why the hell does he want me? I’m a grumpy old man._

Eren, reading Levi’s mind, murmured softly “I don’t care.”

Levi still did. He knew with his personality, how he was, he’d somehow end up hurting or losing the other. He was too young, too innocent. Too pure.

 _Too fucking beautiful_.

“I know you don’t,” he answered. Levi leaned in closer to move the wild chestnut hair out of Eren’s eyes that were memorizing his captain’s face.

“Good night, Eren.”

“Good night, Corporal.”

Throwing caution to the wind, Levi kissed the beautiful boy’s soft lips.

And of course, Eren kissed back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I just really love Marina and the Diamonds I'm sorry)


	4. Valley of the Dolls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Born with a void, hard to destroy with love or hope  
> Built with a heart, broken from the start so now  
> I die slow
> 
> -Valley of the Dolls by Marina and the Diamonds
> 
> AKA: Eren and Levi get stranded in Titan-filled woods

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, there is actually going to be one more chapter after this one and THAT one is gonna involve the smut. This chapter was a bit more serious, so I didn't think smut belonged in it. Good news is I have the last chapter almost completely written, so it won't be too long! Thank you for reading!

Something happened.

Eren, as usual, was grouped with Levi in another expedition outside the walls. The formation was quickly heading towards a refueling point when they were ambushed. Three titans came from seemingly out of nowhere: the first, a tall aberrant, swept his massive arm through the formation scattering the horses and killing one soldier in the process. The second, a heavy titan with a shorter stature than the first, grabbed two of the other soldiers and began to slowly devour them. By the times the screams reached Eren and Levi’s ears they were already using their maneuver gear to make a quick escape through a small forest of trees.

Eren pleaded for Corporal Levi to go back with him as the air whistled through their gear. They needed to save the others who weren’t as fast. Levi ignored him, telling him to _hurry it the fuck up already_ and _they’re already dead, the titans are distracted now, we need to get someplace safe._

“Corporal Levi we need to go back!”

“…”

“LEVI!”

Corporal Levi came to a stop on a sturdy branch high in the balcony of the jungle of trees. Levi’s landing was so sudden that Eren nearly slammed into the tree as he came to stand next to the older soldier.

“We cannot go back, Eren. We need to hide right now. You know as well as I do they’re already dead. You need to accept that, Eren.”

“Levi, their horses are gone!” the boy screamed, near tears.

“SO ARE OURS!!!”

Eren jumped slightly, not used to hearing his captain speak so loudly to him. He took a couple of breaths, gathering his thoughts, looked back at Levi.

“Yes, you’re right. Our horses are gone but we should have enough gas to get back and get them to bring them back here with us! We can’t just abandon them, sir.”

“They’re already dead, Jaeger. We need to plan our next move because those titans aren’t going to be sated for long; we need to get out of here--”

“I CAN TRANSFORM,” interrupted Eren.

“EREN, YOU AREN’T THINKING CLEARLY!”

Levi winced to himself at the harsh tone used to break Eren out of his murderous reverie. He hated having to yell at the brat, but now it was absolutely integral for the kid to listen to the meaning behind his words. Levi knew they only have a limited amount of time to find a place to hide that isn’t situated in the disappointingly short trees. Titans could come for them at any time and they need to move, now. If Eren transformed, he would give off a lightning bolt that would be a sparkling arrow, pointing the Titans to where Levi hid. In the small area of trees that could hardly be called a forest, there would be nowhere for Levi to go that he could hide fast enough.

Eren must have realized this, because he kept quiet. Trying to calm himself down, Eren began mentally mapping out places nearby where they could lay low until nightfall or until someone rescued them. Which seemed very unlikely, as they were already miles outside of the Survey Corps main formation, didn’t have horses, and only a couple of flares. If Eren were to transform into a Titan now, the three titans that killed their comrades would know their position. Retreat was the only option now.

Eren took a deep breath, said “where should we go?”

* * *

 

They found a hiding place no more than twenty minutes later. A small, but thick hollowed out tree that could fit both of them. Levi hated being on the ground but it was the only option currently. If they really needed to escape they had their maneuver gear, but gas was limited as they’d missed their refill point.

Quite literally, they were fucked.

“We should shoot off a flare. Hopefully someone is close enough.”

Levi knew they had a grand total of three flares: two were black, indicating an aberrant attack and the last was blue. Blue flares are a signal to retreat, so they wouldn’t have much luck using that one. So really, they had two that they could use, but they had to be very selective about it. It would definitely be one of their only chances shooting one off now with soldiers nearby.

“Okay,” Levi said. “Do it.”

An arc of black blasted upwards into the slowly darkening sky, a sound like a gunshot ringing in both soldier’s ears. They waited as the smoke from the flare fell back down to earth. It was quiet; so quiet that Eren’s breath seemed unnaturally loud in the isolated area. They waited until there was nothing in the sky but the sunset. Eren and Levi’s stomachs’ growled practically in unison while they were watching the now empty sky.

“What do we have, sustenance-wise?”

“About five-and-a-half granola bars, maybe some rice…;” A moment of silence. “I don’t think we should build a fire right now,” added Eren softly.

“No. We shouldn’t.”

Levi sat next to Eren in the hollow of the tree they’d found. The younger soldier grabbed two granola bars out of his satchel attached to him by a strap. Upon seeing the small size of the bar and judging from how strongly his stomach growled, Eren decided to grab one for both of them to split. They needed to ration as much food as they could. With that thought in mind, Eren asked “how much water do we have?”

“Not a lot. We can have some now, but when it’s bright out again we need to climb the trees and find a clean water source…if there’s even one out here.”

Eren nodded solemnly. He’d already knew they were in deep shit (he wasn’t blind) but he could tell from Levi’s tone that yes, they were in a lot of trouble here. No one had answered the black flare and it was already twilight. As Levi and Eren had two sips of water each, the titan shifter knew they had a lengthy night ahead of them. Getting lost without a horse was as good as a death sentence outside the walls, not including the miniscule trees that could easily be towered by any decent-sized titan. Eren’s eyes grew heavy after the meager food and water ration. He was still hungry but wasn’t going to let that stop him. He’d lived with less after Reiner and Berthold broke the wall. The memory stirred something in his gut, and Levi moved closer.

“…Corporal, will you hold me? It’s cold, and I don’t like sleeping alone.”

Levi took a moment to look at the young soldier. _It’s those green eyes_ , he thought over and over in his head. _It’s just_ _those green eyes that are making me feel this way_. Said eyes were shining in the limited light before complete darkness kicked in.

_He’s only fifteen. He must be scared._

Corporal Levi wrapped Eren’s slightly quivering frame in his arms, holding him tight. The boy’s body was startlingly warm in the cold night air and only then did Levi realize that he himself was absolutely freezing. The beautiful boy was practically curled in his lap and soft, brown hair brushed against Levi’s jaw as he held him close. With Eren’s body warming him, Levi held him as he fell asleep.

**_ Thirty Six Hours Later _ **

 

“Corporal?”

“What?”

“Y’know…if we’re gonna die out here…”

Levi sighed heavily.

“…then. I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“…What are you talking about, Eren?”

Levi looked at the young boy next to him. It had been at least a day and a half they’d been stranded out here, and the rations were completely gone. Both soldiers had tried to eat as little as they could and drink as little water as possible, but a titan had appeared the first morning after they’d fallen asleep in the hollow of the tree. They used their maneuver gear to bolt, but had left their food, water, and meager shelter behind in order to get away as quick as possible. There had been no time to grab anything, and both were weak from hunger and thirst.

_And yet, he still looks beautiful._

Eren looked back at his corporal, smiled and continued, “For saving me in the courtroom. For not blaming me when our squad died. For carrying me down the stairs when I was too drunk to walk…for kissing me.”

“I didn’t kiss you,” answered Levi.

Eren jumped with a start, the beginnings of hurt and confusion in his eyes. He blushed red, Levi noted. If they only had a limited amount of time left, Levi wanted to see that embarrassed face at least one more time.

“You kissed me,” said Levi, softly, teasingly.

Eren looked straight at Levi, laughed.

“Yeah. But you kissed back!” he snarked.

“Oh-hoh, is that right? Someone’s cleaning all the men’s bathrooms when we get back to base.”

There was a tense moment of silence, filled with the things both of them knew but neither of them would say. Eren and Levi were leaning against the trunk of one of the tallest trees, breathing labored with hunger pains and dehydration.

Levi pulled out the flare gun from his pocket with one last round in it, the blue one signaling retreat. They were lucky enough it had been on Levi when they were ambushed but they’d shot off both black rounds with no results.

“Last chance, Corporal?”

“Yeah, Jaeger. Last chance.”

Eren looked at the beat up flare gun in Levi’s pale hands, looking larger than it had any right to be.

“So,” Eren continued, “if we don’t make it out of here…”

Levi groaned.

“Can you please stop it with the dramatics, Eren; you’re making everything worse than it already is.”

“No, Corporal. I have to say this!”

“…Fine. If it makes you feel better about yourself, go on ahead.”

“I love you.”

Levi stopped moving, stopped breathing, only thought about how those words sounded coming from Eren’s mouth. It was even worse that they were directed at him, Levi thought.

“You don’t have to answer…or say…anything. I just want you to know. I love you, Levi. And if we…don’t, uh…make it back…just please. Will you please, look for me on the other side?”

Levi couldn’t take this, his heart was breaking. But he remained silent, listening to the only person he knew who was stupid and naïve enough to believe in an afterlife, let alone that Levi belonged there with him in any way whatsoever.

“Corporal, please look for me and I’ll find you, okay?” the boy asked as his voice shook.

Levi was near tears but pushed them back. Eren didn’t deserve any of this. He didn’t deserve to watch his mom die, didn’t deserve all the pain he’d been through, didn’t deserve to be born into a world like this where innocence was snuffed out as easily as a candle in the wind. He sure as hell didn’t deserve to die. But somehow, though. Somehow, Eren had maintained his innocence in this cruel world. He looked over Levi’s head, to the sky, at something Levi himself could not see, but had always hoped would be there. Levi wanted to make it out of this, to keep protecting Eren, to finally be able to find out what in the fuck Eren was looking at and watch it unfold before him. He wanted to watch that happen with Eren here, in this world, and them together.

“Okay, Eren” Levi said, conviction strong in his voice. “I promise.”

They kissed and covered each other’s ears as they set off their last smoke round.

* * *

 

Finally, after forty hours of being lost, a rescue crew had come for them. They were sent out by Commander Erwin himself, and consisted of Sasha, Jean, Connie, Mikasa, Armin, and Hange. All of them had volunteered.

 The relief on Eren’s face was palpable, tears collecting in the corner of his eyes when he saw his friends and comrades. All Levi could look at was Eren. All he could think about was how grateful that he and Eren were going to survive, _at least_ one more day. That was all he had asked for. Levi turned to Eren, took both of the young soldier’s hands in his.

“I love you too, Eren.”

**Author's Note:**

> Get @ me: m00nbeems.tumblr.com


End file.
